Is It Bad That the Main Character’s a Roleplayer? - Chapter 314
Episode 314: Tell Me (8)
Daniel cried for a while and then quickly moved away from me. Has he clearly given up on revenge or is he simply putting it on hold? It’s not clear yet.
“Is it possible to believe in the idea of a spirit being possessed?”
“okay. “It is unfortunate that there is no physical evidence to convince you.”
“…No, I believe it. “I think what you’ve done so far supports him.”
“I see…”
I could slightly see the corners of my eyes that were tearing up from crying so much. However, we did not show it to each other like we promised. Rather than trying to take care of each other’s pride, it’s closer to not pretending to know because each person’s situation is too burdensome.
“You lost your guard at all.”
“…Iknow, right.”
Instead, we shifted slightly and leaned against the wall of the watchtower.
Next to each seat, there is a hole that looks out onto the magic station. It was a location where you could check by just sitting down and turning your head.
“…How did that happen?”
“If you are asking why I came into this body, there is no such thing. “The boy just wanted someone who could overcome demons, and I just happened to fit that requirement.”
“Then why did you hide that fact when we first met?”
“It might be unpleasant for you to hear, but I didn’t know. I couldn’t remember exactly. “Exactly what I said back then.”
We used it to stand guard as instructed by Lord Soseong. Since each person turns their head in the opposite direction, they do not see the other person at all.
“It was the devil’s trick. “I spent my days swayed only by the memories the devil left behind, not knowing that I was a ghost who had been descended or that I was not the only one who existed in this body.”
“…The memories I left behind.”
“What happened to the owner of this body. “It’s not mine.”
“…Is that so. So you’ve got it back now?”
“okay.”
We continued our conversation slowly, with half of the field of view filled with watchtowers and walls, and the other half filled with the desert. Since it was a repetition of what I said to the meister, it wasn’t very difficult for me to pick out each sentence.
[Actually, you have never lost anything, but you are also a deceiver.]
That includes the subtle hints of anger. I just turned away from that guy. I was feeling too low right now to blush with embarrassment.
“Is there a way to solve the code?”
“If I last nine years without being corrupted, the devil will go to hell and I will return to where I belong.”
“The original owner of that body will get his body back?”
“okay.”
Sigh. In the meantime, I could hear the sound of the head and body turning as fabric brushed against the skin. Considering that I hadn’t moved since a while ago and the sound came from behind, it was probably Daniel who did that.
“…You said you saw a boy earlier. “So does that mean the original owner of that body is still with you?”
“now. “Not always.”
“I don’t feel anything in particular, but… it’s amazing.”
“It’s on my right hand, can’t you feel it?”
“…yes. “Were you there?”
I glanced at my right hand and my right side. These are the locations of Faust and Fury, respectively.
‘explanation.’
[…It’s a soul body, so of course I can’t feel anything. The reason you can see us is because our souls are connected to the body.]
Oh, was that the principle? I thought it existed through the use of magic power, Magi, or something like that, but for some reason, no one seemed to know.
“…Are you still crying?”
While I was letting go of my anger, Daniel asked me carefully. Somewhere in the weakened voice, emotions that cannot be erased still pile up like a mountain.
I understood it.
“okay.”
“Hi!”
Faust, who was close to exhaustion, crouched in surprise.
It was burdensome to see his own sins on the chopping block, but he was also right for being wrong, so he felt guilty, tormented, and sorry… It was a typical example of someone who felt like he had to apologize but was strangely sad and just cowered.
“Is it true that you’re crying because you’re really sorry?”
“Sigh.”
If it were a normal person, I would have been dehydrated by this point, but my soul body seems to be a little different.
Faust cried again. Personally, I think it was a scene that I was glad Daniel didn’t see.
“…well. However, as I think, if the tears were for oneself rather than out of regret, it would have been impossible to keep crying without stopping for even a moment.”
Can not help it. A child crying is a good sight to feel pity for, regardless of whether the child is right or wrong… As someone who cannot forgive the child, that pity made me feel even more upset.
Why are you crying? Are you crying because you did a good job? I’m the one who really wants to cry, but why are you… like that?
“How pitiful.”
“…So did you forgive? From what I hear, it doesn’t seem like you got into that situation because you wanted to.”
Meanwhile, Daniel noticeably changed his mind. I could have caught him and asked him questions, but I didn’t bother to do so.
“It’s not like this happened because I wanted to.”
“then…?”
“well. “Are you going to forgive?”
Instead, like him, I avoided answering. This was because I did not want to offend Faust by repeating what I had said, and above all, I did not want my answer to affect Daniel.
“…that.”
After all, forgiveness was clearly the right of the victim only. It is a right that no one can interfere with, that should not be decided by anyone, and that does not need to be forced as if pushed by anyone’s choice.
“That’s…”
So I wanted Daniel to come to a conclusion based solely on his own feelings, and he did so.
“I also can’t forgive.”
The voice he spat out, one by one, as if speaking to himself, was seething with pain and heat.
“I know the child is not at fault, but I still cannot forgive him.”
“is it.”
“…yes. So tell that to your child. Don’t hide behind you and cry, but come out proudly in front of me someday. “Please come out and properly explain the circumstances at the time and apologize profusely.”
But at least it was better than when he first encountered me. At that time, he was consumed with anger without knowing where to direct his anger, but now he at least knew where his anger should be directed.
“Yes, I will definitely tell you. “I think you’ve already heard it.”
“Is that so. “Then that’s it.”
I guess this problem will eventually end. I cast my gaze at the boy who only I could see.
‘I heard.’
Then the boy hid his wet, white eyes behind his eyelids. Grumbling. My head moved slightly along with the falling tears.
‘I gave you the opportunity to atone, so you must do the rest.’
“…Yes.”
After everything is over, will this kid be able to properly apologize to Daniel? How will Daniel accept that apology?
After thinking about it for a while, I came to the conclusion that it was a question I couldn’t figure out. Anyway, by the time the boy can apologize, I will be back home.
So I looked away from the silently sobbing boy and lowered my eyelids. Even though I didn’t do anything, it suddenly became difficult.
* * *
Even after the conversation ended, Daniel glanced at the man a couple of times. It is hard to tell whether the other person, who is not shaking at all, is asleep or just awake and still.
It was similar to what he said. It is difficult to tell whether he was really telling the truth or whether this was a deception. It was the most incomprehensible being in the world.
“…Don’t force yourself to forgive either.”
However, the reason I agreed to his words was because of some kind of fatigue.
The hatred towards something that is not clear whether it is an enemy or not, and the confusion that comes from it being extremely heroic. In the end, because these emotions were maintained using his energy as fuel, he no longer wanted to put any effort into them.
“…what?”
“Everything that surrounds you.”
Anyway, didn’t this take a long time? It’s been over 6 years since I’ve been burning out the energy I should have used in daily life, but wouldn’t this be enough to tire me out?
“It is certainly something to be pitied for not being given the opportunity to become an adult, but that doesn’t mean we have to give in unconditionally.”
Above all, Daniel did not want to be suspicious.
The eyes are said to have worked hard to maintain their shape, but in reality, they are almost completely worn out and damaged. Even though the anger is deep enough to be like that, the good intentions that seem to be suppressed somehow for someone else.
If you have to doubt even that, there won’t be a single thing in the world you can trust.
“There is no reason to feel sorry for receiving the rights you deserve. “You should feel sorry for not receiving the rights you deserve and hate what makes you do that.”
So it was. That was the only reason I decided to believe those absurd words.
I don’t want to think of things like that as belonging to the devil, and I don’t want to doubt people who I feel a sense of kinship with.
The faith he had followed his entire life and the conscience he had maintained until now did not allow him to complain with his eyes and ears closed.
“So, nameless ascetic, don’t just suppress your emotions.”
So he just resigned himself. I sympathized like that.
“It is a form of arrogance to try to endure all hardships because you think your situation is better than others.”
I felt sorry for the person who entered the body of a stranger and went through all kinds of hardships, and if I had not been careful, I would have had to bear all his resentment.
The resentment and regret left behind, like ashes from burning everything, subsided with the lukewarm warmth. All that remains now is a shallow sense of sympathy and identification with others.
“You can be angry with me. “It’s okay for you to say why are you fucking with me when I didn’t do it.”
“…I don’t think that’s right.”
“No, you can do that. “All the verbal abuse I gave you was something you didn’t need to hear.”
“….”
“Or are you also involved? “What you said so far was just a lie to avoid the situation?”
“That’s not it.”
“Then ask me to apologize. “Because you deserve it.”
Daniel hesitated and watched the other person looking back at him. His eyes, which were of different colors on the left and right, were narrowed as if he could not guess his intentions.
“…an apology is not something that is usually requested.”
“In general, yes. But are you confident that you will sincerely relieve me of my resentment when I apologize now? “Can you accurately estimate the hurt caused by my words in the first place?”
Daniel found it a bit funny and sad at the same time. People who are too strong sometimes don’t know how much it hurts. Even the largest lake in the world will eventually run out if it is pumped out endlessly.
“Please tell me how much you hate the unfair verbal abuse and treatment. “I will apologize accordingly.”
“…If anyone hears it, they’ll think I’m the one who will apologize.”
“Are you offended? “Then I will apologize for this as well.”
“It’s not necessary to bow down and receive me.”
Still, if you look at the other person’s faint smile, you can guess that this person still has some talent left.
Daniel felt a little fortunate in that regard. I also imagine that it would have been better if they had been able to meet their true selves in a different situation.
“Reminds me of a scholar…”
At that time, a muttering that was clearly muttering to himself lingered slightly on the other person’s lips. I don’t know who the scholar is, but I can tell that he is precious just by looking at his distant eyes.
Daniel pretended not to hear anything and got up.
“Then let’s go first.”
In fact, there was an unavoidable reason for this.
“Because they came out without reporting.”
Daniel He was currently meeting his partner, abandoning his mission.
In other words, he committed something close to desertion.
“…Good luck.”
“…yes.”
Of course, he is not an official soldier here, and the person who claims to be his superior now has a different affiliation, so he won’t be able to say much. This is even more so because he is a member of the temple and not a member of the military dispatched to the city.
However, just because a person is not disciplined does not mean that the mistake goes away. Daniel went down the watchtower, determined to apologize formally to his superior.
“…old man!”
Then, a young man fidgeting at the entrance of the watchtower caught my eye. Because they were members of the warrior’s immediate group, they were surplus personnel who could not give orders to anyone.
“…don’t call me that. “Please, please.”
“Look at what you do to Nari.”
Anyway, I think I roughly understand why he’s acting like this. Daniel sighed weakly as he watched the gazes that continued to roll behind him.
“Go up. “It will be okay.”
“…! Just look at Nari’s scars! “I’m going to put a rock in my pillow later!”
I’ve been sleeping comfortably these past few days. Daniel scratched his head as he watched people pass him by. He already felt like the back of his head was hurting.